Modern modes…

Hello ladies and gentlemen, today I have sacrificed $5 of my own hard earned money to help you understand why modern ‘suspender belts’ are no good. You’re welcome.

A while ago I walked into a Sydney lingerie shop, just out of interest, to see what was available. I was trying to make sense of some sort of suspender belt when one of the shop assistants came over to ask me if I needed her help. She asked if I had ever worn a suspender belt before, I replied that I had and that I wear either a suspender belt or a girdle any time that I wear a skirt or dress, which is most of the time. She looked shocked and said, ‘but I thought you were only meant to wear them in the bedroom, they’re just designed to please boys…’

OH. MY. GOD.

That comment basically confirmed what I thought a lot of girls thought about suspenders and stockings, they are a tool that women use to convince men to have sex with them.

I personally do not wear them as a tool of seduction (although it can sometimes help in some situations, I will admit), I wear suspension because I prefer wearing stockings to pantyhose. However, many brands seem to think that they are worth wearing so I thought I would give them go.

My original intention was to wear them for a day at work and then report back. I tried the belt on tonight, just to make sure it fit, however… I couldn’t bear wearing the damn thing for more than ten minutes, so I scrapped that idea.

This ‘suspender belt’ is from Target and cost me $5 AUD in the sale. It’s a size 14.

So why is this ‘suspender belt’ so bad? The reason that I cannot stand these things is that they cause a lot of women to hate wearing stockings and suspension. As a lot of people don’t know a great deal about good underwear, they think that this is the only style available. The truth is that when women were wearing stockings on a daily basis in the 1950s and thereabouts, they had to wear strong foundations as they were moving around all day, going about their daily business – There is no way that they would have worn anything as flimsy as this. Some women have worn these things for a few hours and felt their stockings slipping down, causing bagginess around their ankles and knees and requiring the wearer to continuously pull up the belt. This is very off-putting and I can understand why, after wearing this type of suspender belt, they wouldn’t want to wear stockings or anything related to stockings again.

Not only does the belt provide very little support to the stockings, but unless you have zero body fat, you’re very likely to get a good few bulges. Good suspender belts are deep and provide firm control to the tummy and hips, this pink thing however is just unflattering. It was also quite uncomfortable as it cut into me.

Plus, I think it’s pretty ugly…

Below are some photos of me, in my new least favourite suspender belt. Sorry for not wearing a bra but I didn’t feel like it.

photo 1

photo 3

photo 4-1

photo 2-2

photo 2

Check out the back strap, struggling with my bubble butt…

photo 3-2

photo 5

photo 1-1

photo 2-1

The one good thing about this belt is that it has metal clips, however they are covered up by (my pet hate) ribbons.

photo 3-1

photo 4

So ladies, if you want to look sexy or you just want to keep your stockings from ending up around your ankles, don’t waste your money on this rubbish, invest in a strong, structured piece from a good brand.

Elinor

13 thoughts on “Modern modes…

  1. They are rubbish, I have some from before I knew I get better ones. One pair the clips are so poor that don’t hold onto the stockings. Wish I had the sense at the time to return them

  2. Ms. Elinor-
    I couldn’t agree with you more! Well written and should be required reading for any woman looking into wearing ‘real’ stockings.
    Ken

  3. If a woman needs a cheap suspender belt like this to entice a man, I feel so sorry for her. Usually men are ever so eager. If she really wants to be sexy, she should wear a real suspender or girdle as you said, preferably one with AT LEAST 8 tabs

  4. And how and where do you get the real mccoy?
    I really appreciate the retro style but is not my thing, where do I get the real thing without looking like a Mad Men’ fan (without any offense)…?

  5. Hello again, Elinor, and thank you for this latest set of pics. While I think you would still look a miilion dollars in a boiler-suit, this is eactly what I meant when I wrote to you, saying that my lovely wife used to hate these ‘bedroom’ suspender belts. They never work very well, do nothing to give a little support, and usually fail miserably to do their job — especially with those plastic suspender-clasps.

    It is still possible to find the wonderful, old-fashioned suspender belts, but they are a bit pricy. Did you check out Axford’s, as I suggested when I wrote to you last? They have some beautiful shapewear and suspender belts that you would absolutely fall in love with!

    My respectful good wishes, dear lady.

    T

  6. The first ‘suspension’ garment I bought was a pair of Kylie Minogue mesh undies with the straps attached to the leg opening. Needless to say, ten minutes into wearing them my knickers and stockings were somewhere near my knees! Unfortunately I was at work at the time!!!!

  7. So well written Elinor. Curious as to why you dislike garter ribbons! They somtimes do get in the way. I need sturdy garters without embellishment to hold up my 70 denier hosiery!

  8. Pingback: My big NO NOs of shapewear | The Nylon Swish

  9. Good review Elinor, you are correct about these garter belts being rubbish, they are uncomfortable to wear and the plastic clips are horrible, they are always coming undone, at least when you tried wearing one you have the hips to hold the suspender belt up, me being a guy and not having hips the belt just slides down and I spend most of my time tugging the belt and the stockings back up. Personally I prefer pantyhose, now days you can get some very awesome pantyhose, nothing like back in the day when they were 100% nylon and we’re a bit itchy and hot…. but, I still loved wearing them anyways 🙂

    Keep up the awesome job with your blog Elinor, it is the best!

    Bob

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